Don’t Wear White After Labor Day
Don’t Wear White After Labor Day (unless it's NuttyBuddy Heather-White)
Look, we understand that you don't expect to hear fashion advice from the NUTTSletter. Tough cookies, because this advice is fashionably important.
Top 3 Reasons to Ditch the Tighty-Whities:
- White briefs and other light-colored underpants show stains. All stains! While you could bleach them, who has the time or wants all that extra work, for underpants? That's not even mentioning how bleach can turn your underpants into cheese-cloth. (Save the sheer underpants for a special occasion please).
- Black goes with everything. So, you can be stylish in the locker room, stylish in the porta-john, or even stylish in the house while you wait for that next load of laundry to finish.
- Black works with any season. Winter? Yup, they will be able to see your frostbitten butt out in the snow if you chose to forgo common sense and run out in your white shorts. Spring? Yessir, have some spring in your step as you know that you are not accruing yellowing sweat stains. Summer? Double down, you have black underpants that can be worn under the shortest shorts and show practically no stains, you are cleared for awesome. Fall? You might fall, everyone does. But even as the cold sneaks back in, you have underpants that aren't brown and yellow from the rest of the year or paper thin from too much bleaching.
Ok – One More! We can't help ourselves. Have we mentioned the stains yet? We have, but for real, light-colored underwear shows every stain you can think of! Here is a brief list of possible stains light colored underpants show like bad modern-art in an underpants- museum: grass, red-wine, poop-streaks, blood, sweat, chocolate, dirt, etc. Would you rather try to make someone believe that is really a ‘dirt’ stain, or just buy black underpants? Sometimes you have to pinch one off fast, and maybe good wiping isn’t in the works. You can still save yourself from traumatizing everyone else by not wearing light colored briefs that advertise that crappy situation.